The Story Hour Redux
Greetings to the Tribe!
I hope everyone is enjoying a great holiday season. (I'm sorry if holiday greetings sound trite or overused to some people, BUT kiss my fanny, I really mean it, anyway!)
In my local area, a few years ago, I used to have a weekly humorist-style column in the local newspaper that became rather popular. It was known as "The Story Hour." I have decided to get in my often amusing stories about my family -- and/or my own self-involved neuroses -- right here at the Storyland Jamboree blog. So .... if ya'll are game, then so am I. Today I may post more than one just to get us started. This blog started off as a writing inspiration blog and now I have decided that the best way to get myself writing is to do what comes most natural to me -- making fun of myself and those that I love.
To get us started, let me introduce you to my husband, Keith. See Keith? This IS his happy face, by the way.
I told the following story on Facebook a few months ago, but it's a good one! Here goes:
So, here's what happened: I woke up one morning about a couple of weeks ago and I hear Keith in the bathroom shouting and slamming things. He comes out a few minutes later and informs me we suddenly have those big, black carpenter ants (those huge ants that look like they can carry stuff off from out the house). He went into the bathroom and there were like a dozen of them!! So, he was smashing and killing them all.
I go into the bathroom a while later to finish getting ready for work and there are all these dead ant corpses on the floor!! Disgusted, I clean them up and finish getting ready. I told Keith I would have appreciated it if he had cleaned up the corpses after the kill, thank you very much. He said, "You cleaned them up?! Why did you do that?"
I was befuddled by his question. "I didn't want to stand on ant carcasses while I get ready for work."
"I can't believe you cleaned up the bodies!" He said. He sounded sincerely upset. "I left them there on purpose!"
"What possible reason could you have for leaving a bunch of dead ant corpses on the floor?!"
(*Insert image of me here looking at Keith as if he'd lost his mind.*)
His explanation left me speechless. He said, "I left them there for a reason. I left them there ... as a warning ...."
My warrior. (Sigh)
I hope everyone is enjoying a great holiday season. (I'm sorry if holiday greetings sound trite or overused to some people, BUT kiss my fanny, I really mean it, anyway!)
In my local area, a few years ago, I used to have a weekly humorist-style column in the local newspaper that became rather popular. It was known as "The Story Hour." I have decided to get in my often amusing stories about my family -- and/or my own self-involved neuroses -- right here at the Storyland Jamboree blog. So .... if ya'll are game, then so am I. Today I may post more than one just to get us started. This blog started off as a writing inspiration blog and now I have decided that the best way to get myself writing is to do what comes most natural to me -- making fun of myself and those that I love.
To get us started, let me introduce you to my husband, Keith. See Keith? This IS his happy face, by the way.
I told the following story on Facebook a few months ago, but it's a good one! Here goes:
So, here's what happened: I woke up one morning about a couple of weeks ago and I hear Keith in the bathroom shouting and slamming things. He comes out a few minutes later and informs me we suddenly have those big, black carpenter ants (those huge ants that look like they can carry stuff off from out the house). He went into the bathroom and there were like a dozen of them!! So, he was smashing and killing them all.
I go into the bathroom a while later to finish getting ready for work and there are all these dead ant corpses on the floor!! Disgusted, I clean them up and finish getting ready. I told Keith I would have appreciated it if he had cleaned up the corpses after the kill, thank you very much. He said, "You cleaned them up?! Why did you do that?"
I was befuddled by his question. "I didn't want to stand on ant carcasses while I get ready for work."
"I can't believe you cleaned up the bodies!" He said. He sounded sincerely upset. "I left them there on purpose!"
"What possible reason could you have for leaving a bunch of dead ant corpses on the floor?!"
(*Insert image of me here looking at Keith as if he'd lost his mind.*)
His explanation left me speechless. He said, "I left them there for a reason. I left them there ... as a warning ...."
My warrior. (Sigh)
Just like the primitive tribes in the Amazon leave skulls on stakes and on trees to serve as a warning about trespassing into their territory... so I leave the victims as a warning to all the other uninvited critters as to what their fate will be should they trespass into my domain...
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